Keep Calm and Carry On
Recently we had a bout of rough bedtimes with my older daughter. We were transitioning from camp > vacation > school. Hubs and I were busy with work & stressed. We were all overtired. All the things. The difficult behavior really escalated each evening. I lost my sh*t, over and over. Even the ever cool and even-tempered Hubs lost his sh*t at times. It was a sh*tshow, if you will. It felt like a vicious cycle that we couldn't kick. I sought advice, as always. At first nothing did the trick. My child continued to push my buttons, I continued to erupt. And then... One night I didn't get riled up in response to her provoking. I didn't give her that power. She is a kid, I reminded myself. I remained in control of me. I couldn't control her meltdown, but that didn't matter. I paused before reflexively reacting in a big way. I was firm in my stance; I was prepared to walk away, and I wasn't waffling. And then my daughter, my sweet, big-hearted and amazing daughter, calmed down. Temper tantrum deescalated. All because I handled my self. What an important reminder. Whenever I lose it on my kid, it's about me, not about her. Even if her conduct is maddening, as every child is capable of having those moments. No matter what, I need to stay sturdy, even if that means walking away. As I reminded my little love the other day during a teary repair, mommy always comes back.
AES
P.S. A trick for keeping cool.