The Dos & Don'ts of Being an Actual, Full-Grown Woman

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Perhaps it has something to do with the particular people and brands I choose to follow, but it seems to me that Twitter is abuzz with feministic notions lately, including equal pay for equal work demands, anti sexual harassment protests, abortion clinic news and more. I have never considered myself  "a feminist," but I do have morals and I happen to be female, so I'm paying special attention to these women's issues. But really, these "women's issues" should be "people's issues," don't you think?

I recently came across this clip of Sarah Silverman raising awareness (and funds) for the Equal Payback Project. It's no laughing matter, but Silverman makes the case for equal pay in a most comical way. Go to YouTube for the full, R-rated video.

Silverman may not make me laugh all that much via her raunchy standup specials, but she has my utmost admiration and respect, especially after making The Equal Payback Project video.  

In general, anyone who puts herself out there in any creative endeavor has my support times a million. I feel vulnerable and insecure all the time just by posting innocuous blogs. Fellow writers, comedians, artists and story-tellers of all types inspire courage in me, from fashion bloggers sharing their "OOTD's" to next level heroes like Malala.

But back to our homegrown hero, Sarah Silverman. A lot of her work is not necessarily appropriate for all audiences, but something of Silverman's I do feel comfortable (and compelled) to share here is an article I had dog-eared back in the June 2014 issue of Glamour magazine: The Dos & Don'ts of Being an Actual, Full-Grown Woman. As Glamour says, Silverman is both wisecracking and just plain wise. See below for a condensed version of Silverman's Dos and Don'ts, as published in Glamour:

Do get your sweat on most days.

Don't clutter your life with stuff you can't afford.

Do brush and floss your teeth every day for reals.

Don't expect someone to "complete" you.

Do be with someone who gets turned on by you being turned on in bed.

Don't be a bitter ex.

Do listen to your mom.

Don't lack initiative. People tell me, "want to be a writer? OK, then write." There's no trick. No one's gonna knock on your door and ask you to write. Just write, dummy. Put your 10,000 hours in (see: Malcolm Gladwell), and be undeniable.

Also, don't let defeat discourage you. I got fired from Saturday Night Live and fired from my next job, a sitcom, right after. It made me gun-shy. But I lived through it. I kept going. As Charlie Kaufman said: "Do not worry about failure. Failure is a badge of honor. It means your risked failure."

Do start reflecting. I do therapy. If therapy isn't your thing, then go to church or get a Pema Chodron book for $9 on Audible--whatever you need to do to live an examined life. It'll make your life (and the lives of people around you) exponentially richer.

Don't talk sh-t about yourself. You'll start to believe it.

Do be nice to yourself.

Sarah, thank you for sharing.

A

Image via Esquire ["The Dos & Don'ts of Being an Actual, Full-Grown Woman" Glamour, June 2014]